sometimes, my head explodes

the influence of published thought December 1, 2007

Filed under: about me,my evolution — somniare @ 2:43 pm

I have started feeding my brain again. At my current state of detachment I’ve been feeling an inability to connect with people around me and failing to communicate even the simplest of the theories my mind is eternally constructing. It’s been a while since I took the time to find decent books to help reshape my thoughts into coherence.

People underestimate the power of reading. Published works be them reference text, non-fiction psychology written in the form of memoir, poetry, and all in between… they are all testament to what the mind is capable of forming when thought can be organized. Even if I take the time to read the most poorly written compilation of half-theories and pretension, it’s still more than I have been capable of putting together. My mind is a constant jumble of stories and verses and I struggle to form them beyond the broken sentences that overwhelm.

It was pointed out to me once that a stagnant mind and writer’s block can be healed by expanding ones mental library. I absorbed that piece of knowledge and have taken the initiative. It is helping to an extent but I think that it may take some time to apply the ability reading bestows upon a writer’s mind. The hurtle seems to be that the absorbing of information and the stories constructed by other minds should inspire and not influence. It’s all to easy for someone like myself to absorb the styles of others and find myself losing my individual techniques. While I may be attempting to find my head filled with more complete thought, my disconnected sentences and abhorrence for proper punctuation in my poetic endeavors are something I don’t necessarily want to lose… I just need to push them to the back on occasion so that I may polish my more refined skills in weaving an effective story.

I am struggling very hard to break free of the walls that seem intent on restraining me in nearly every creative aspect I attempt. I just about sold my soul to acquire the book Transcending CSS. My reasoning is that there is a solid point made in the book about the fact that code is extremely limited for web designers being that it was created for designers and not by designers so there is a lot of necessity to breach the gap between a mind which functions very systematically and a mind that is predominantly creatively inclined. A lot of designers (myself included) struggle with the merging of two such opposite ways of thinking. I am going to attempt to apply some of the knowledge I acquire using this book over at the CSS Zen Garden before designing my portfolio site. Yes! I am planning a portfolio site for my artwork.

I mention boxes a lot and how much I can’t stand them but the reality is that we only create them for ourselves by acknowledging their existence. If you simply seek methods to break down barriers, you are destined to fail. There is no such thing. The only way to remove the shelter from around your life is to find something that exists in the world to change your perception. Boxes are like optical illusions… your brain only thinks that they are there. Writer’s/artist’s block is simply a state of mind. The inability to move forward in life due to feeling as if your life is at a stand still is also a state of mind. There’s a lot at our fingertips to allow us to shift perspective and see past the invisible strings that tie us to what seems to be impassable barriers. This is absolutely never the case. In a world where everything seems to be either tangible or intangible… isn’t it interesting to consider that the world is in actuality powered by the mind and there has to be something more than those two simple words that we use to define the elements that we allow to affect us?

Getting back to the expansion of knowledge. Yes, I have begun reading again in efforts to obtain new knowledge and refresh what has been lost over the years but more importantly, I am attempting to see writing from other perspectives to better understand where the limitations are. Perspectives are fascinating to me in that there are no two that are exactly the same. There are those that agree, those that complement, those that contradict and those that argue. The list goes on and on. Each mind is a book in itself and those that have been blessed with the liberty of expression to be able to display their concepts onto paper for the world… well, I’m using those minds as a starting point. Once I have grown tired of delving into those obvious displays, I will be much more able to probe the brains of those who communicate less conspicuously. A new mission with renewed intrigue means a revived ‘me’.


One Response to “the influence of published thought”

  1. acrylicwinter Says:

    I love when you decide to learn things.

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